June 05, 2007

The one with the bean bag

Last Christmas we got the kids each a personalized bean bag chair. Actually, I just bought the outer covers…I got an inner bag and bought my own filler for Iain's and just slipped Cael's over the bean bag I had got for him the previous year. So Pinxit had been sick...the day we came home and found her lethargic after the drug "overdose", I caught her peeing on Cael's bean bag. Groovy. I stripped the outer cover to wash and sprayed the crap out of the actual bag with Nature's Miracle. It seemed to work ok, but we recently started the migration of toys and other kid stuff to the basement so they have more room, and as soon as I picked up the bean bag to move it, the smell hit me. I tried, but no amount of Nature's Miracle would take care of the smell…the pee obviously had leeched into the filler.

So, in my brilliance I decided that I would just empty the filler, wash the bag really well and buy the same stuff that I'd used tor Iain's to re-fill it. Easy! I flipped the bag around to look for the zipper. There it is!...but it had been disabled by the manufacturer for safety reasons. Fine…I'll just rip it out, empty the filler and buy a new zipper to sew in. No problem!

Off I went to the Evil Big-box Store in search of a zipper and bean bag filler (a.k.a. styrofoam balls). I found all that, but also somehow ended up with two TtFTE short sets, cute placemats also featuring said engine, lightweight summer pants for Cael and some chipboard letters for my scrapbooking. Oh, and something for Jon for Father's Day. Which I can't tell you abt since he'll probably be reading this…heh.

I got home and the kids were still napping…perfect! Jon went out golfing for the rest of the afternoon, and armed with garbage bags for the smelly filler, I started ripping out the zipper.
The old filler was much finer than the bag of "beans" I had just bought. It was literally like shredded styrofoam. So even as I was ripping the zipper stitching out, little bits of foam were flying out and sticking to my arms. There was fine layer of styrofoam snow on the outside of the bag and on the floor around me by the time I got the zipper out. At this point I moved the operation into the furnace room, away from the carpet in the laundry room. Easier to clean off concrete, right? I grabbed a garbage bag and carefully fit the mouth of it over the bean bag opening. I cautiously picked up the bag and the contents started pouring into the garbage bag. Perfect!

The bag was about halfway full when I noticed the small leak around the "seal" of the garbage bag. I adjusted my grip to try and move the bag which failed miserably. In about three seconds, I had a good sized pile of fine stryofoam beads at my feet. I had a semi-smart moment before starting the pouring and had placed the little mat that sits in front of the kitty litter boxes at my feet, so it caught most of it…I just dumped it into the garbage bag. For the rest, I grabbed the broom. Have you ever tried to sweep up packing peanuts? Yeah…they get really staticky. So there I was holding a broom that is coated with little foam beads, my hands are full of them and so are my legs. They are just clinging to me, and the more I try to brush them off, the more charged they get. Luckily I have some dryer sheets on hand…I don't use them in the dryer, but for rubbing my paper before heat embossing when making cards. So I grabbed one and rubbed my hands with it. Success! So I set to rubbing my legs and feet as well. And the broom…and it worked. I quickly swept up the rest of the beads.

As I mentioned, the garbage bag was only halfway full. There was no way I could fit it over the bean bag hole without spilling the contents of both all over the place, so I set to scooping the contents out using the dustpan. Which barely fit in the hole, so every time I pulled the dustpan out of the bean bag, it would hit the edge and most of the beads would fall off, back into the bag. But finally I had filled garbage bag number one and tied it up.*

I was using those easy tie bags with the four "ends" if that makes sense. I tied the first pair and when I pulled it tight, I got a face full of foam snow. Oops. No problem…when I tie the second pair, it will seal the holes right? Nope…now I had FOUR little holes that spewed foam every time I moved the bag. FUCK…this is getting old. So I untie the knots (more spewing…) and tie it up with twist ties that were in a Costco sized box of orange garbage bags being stored in the furnace room. Perfect.

In the middle of all this was a certain Big Little Kitten (a.k.a. Percy) running around exploring my work. So he had foam bits all over his feet, belly and tail. Great. I just rubbed him with my dryer sheet treated hands…didn't want to rub him directly with the sheet. But it was enough and he was de-staticked. AND he smelled fresh for the rest of the day!

Ok, so I decided to skip the green garbage bag for the rest of the beans…the opening was just too small. So I grabbed an orange bag and fit it over the bean bag opening. It was much bigger and I was able to dump the remaining filler into it without spilling any….the bean bag fit right in the garbage bag and I shook it 'til it was empty. FINALLY, something is going right. So the bean bag is empty, but there is lots of residual foam bits inside. I think about just throwing it in the washer as is, but have visions of the machine getting clogged so decide to go outside and give it a shake. Every time I move, the thing is dropping more foam crap, so I run on tip toes (picture a new dad with a dirty diaper…) outside to the carport. There was a bit of a breeze, so I figured the stuff would just float away. And don't worry…it wasn't a HUGE amount of foam being released into the air. So I wait for a gust of wind and start shaking. Did I mention that the car was in the car port? Yeah…Jon was picked up for golf, so the car was right there. Now covered in a fine layer of foam snow. As were my arms, legs and hair. I shook off as best I could and went back in to chuck the bean bag in the washer.

Fastforward to that night. The bean bag was now fresh and clean (and I had wiped the small amount of foam out of the inside of the washer) and ready for the new zipper. I sat down at my sewing machine, found the proper colour of thread and an already wound bobbin and threaded it all up. For whatever reason, the machine kept fucking up. Jamming, thread snapping etc. After close to an hour of fighting with it, changing settings etc., I gave up. I grabbed a needle and another spool of thread and sat down to start hand sewing. Brand new sewing machine, and I'm hand sewing a zipper. I finally finished last night and now all I have to do is fill it with the new (and much bigger) foam beads. Which will be another fun time, thinking back to filling Iain's.

Cael had better really love it. And if a cat pees on it again I might have a nervous breakdown.

*No, they don't recycle…I know, I know…I feel guilty enough.
Bonus conversations:

Cael: Mommy are we going to Costco?
Me: No, not today...
Cael: C-O-S-T-C-O spells Costco!
Me: It sure does…

Cael: (grabbing little plastic wheelbarrow) Mommy, I'm going shopping at Costco!
Me: ok! What are you getting?
Cael: Strawberries!
Me: Great! See you later!
Cael: (does a tour around the pool) Mommy, I'm home…I got lots of juicy strawberries!

(do you think we go to teh Costco too much?)

Cael: (out of no-where) Are you proud of my pee?
Me: Uh, that depends…did you pee your pants?
Cael: Yes! You're so proud!!

Iain: Row, row, row da BOAT, genty dow da PEEEEM…
Cael: IAIN! No more singing!
Iain: Mamalymamalymamalymamaly…
Cael: NO!!!
Iain: Like is a a neeeeeem
Cael: STOP IT!
Iain: Twinkle twinkle wittle stah…
Cael: No Iain, its LITTLE STAR…

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Anonymous TT said...

LOL!Really, im not laughing AT you, im laughing WITH YOU. hehe.

And that last bit about the stop singing.....gosh that is cute. Makes we want another :0)

5/6/07 19:22  
Anonymous Donna said...

mental note for me: never buy the foam filled bean bag chair. ;-)

i notice your new kitty has been given a TtFTE-inspired name. does that little engine filter it's way into everything?

cute story about the singing. marco loves to sing "Life is a highway" - thanks to the "Cars" movie, not Tom Cochrane btw - except he screeches "Life in the hallway...."

6/6/07 11:46  
Blogger Tanya said...

tt, um sure. whatever. ;)

donna, indeed. *sigh*

the name was kind of by accident. his "real" name is percival, but i only call him that when he's in trouble. lol!

cuuute...i love it when they make stuff up. the FUNNIEST thing the kids both sing is from thomas (of bloody course...). its the song that has the line "welcome to the island, the only one we know", but the kids say "welcome to the island, and nummy nummy num". i crack up every time they sing it...and i have it on video. :D

6/6/07 12:18  
Anonymous Donna said...

marco has a new fav movie - "night at the museum". mickey rooney plays an crazy old museum night guard who has memorable (apparently) lines like asking ben stiller "are you crackin' wise?" and "you look like a weirdee". very strange but it's hard to keep a straight face during a reprimand when your 3 yr old looks at you with a twinkle in his eye and asks me if i'm "crackin wise". i have to turn away to hide the grin. ;-)

6/6/07 14:12  
Anonymous Dawn said...

Too cute with the shopping and singing

12/6/07 16:01  
Blogger ccw said...

I am so sorry.

One of my cats peed on the bean bag before vacation. When I tried to remove the inside I ripped several holes in the liner. I gave up and left the ripped and oozing stuff liner on the laundry room sink. I am scared to even try to restuff the chair for fear of the mess.

We live at The Costco.

13/6/07 08:41  

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