Dear Husband

I appreciate that you are sexually frustrated. Spelling out "give me head please" on the fridge using our innocent son's magnetic letters won't help your case. I find it less than romantic. Try making dinner or buying me flowers or something. And no, honking my boobs or grabbing my butt won't work either.

Also, I expect to be left alone when in the bathroom. Coming down the hall and into the bathroom when you hear the shower turn off so you can see me naked just pisses me off. And yes, I did hear you coming and covered up. What did you expect? To find me waiting for you, all alluring and drippy?

For the love of pete, I always have a kid on me. Sometimes I just need to be left alone. I'm sorry, and things WILL get back to "normal" as the kids get older, but in the meantime please be patient.

Thanks...